ok time to update. umm i have an issue with my wrist and its now in a splint so its hard to type....or do anything for that matter. dont ask what happened b/c i dont know and im sick of people asking. daddys bday was today.....ummm went to kyles house this afternoon for a "chat"-- ehh im pretty much guessin its a coin toss as to if it really did any good or if i just went over there and talked to him for no reason. i watched WHEN HARRY MET SALLY this afternoon and this quote that meg ryan says just stuck with me and kinda fits my situation: "I just cant decide if i miss HIM or if i miss the IDEA of him....." but im bettin its the idea of a b/f. but then again, im totally diggin this whole single flirtacious thing-- its kicks butt! it also is affecting a few people (ehem DANIEL) because of a tiny little green-eyed monster......ANYWAYS to cease the dwelling.......not a lot else is goin on except i MIGHT be gettin a Jimmy (as in the s.u.v.). im wearin my brothers white abercrombie hate right now and well, i cant decide if i like it or not......he'd prolly rip it and my hair off my head if he knew i was wearing it lol. wow, birdwalking.... haha my mom just walked back here to ask me something and goes "u look cute in a hat!" gag me....ouch, my wrist....chris loves me........(BIG smile) i know because he told me so......(the not-so-possible BIGGER smile)...gee i feel so special......AHHH i nearly forgot! I'm still prom scouting although im thinkin i might have narrowed it down.......must retreat to the bedroom for the nightly nap......(end blog)

ok this blog isnt gonna be long. ive had this strong pain in my wrist and yet theres no sign of damage, so i asked my biology teacher and she says its prolly carple-tunnel syndrome..........great! just what i always wanted! ok lets see what else.......oh, i havent talked to kyle since 3 days after we broke up....thats been quite pleasant actually because hes a total stranger now. oh yeah and i was reading daniels blogger archives and i found it interesting that the only time he uses "God" is when he is talking about me. such as: God I miss her etc.......i was like hmmm.......anywho, B days are better because I'm always happier, although i have more work and might even be a bit more stressed........I even look better to myself of course, on B days. anywho moving on......been talkin to brandon a LOT lately, missed that........saw steven at the lonoke game friday night, miss him a bit too. jeepers, i dunno what to say about daniel, i love that we are friends again-- its great. sometimes i sit and wonder why i couldnt be what he wanted me to be but then i think that was the past, u cant change it, just learn from it and move on.......ehh theres that confidence again.....ok think short stephanie, im leaving something out i believe.........Ah! another experiment! in psychology i learned that the pupil expands when a strong attraction occurs: in plain english that means that if someone likes u, u can usually tell by how big their pupils are- isnt that awesome? i thought so.....now the question is: WHO shall be my victim??? (end blog)

Haha I almost forgot to tell you- look at what my ex b/f Mark had the guts to send me in an AIM convo: If you think life is bad now, how would you like to be an egg? You only get laid once. You get eaten once. It takes for minutes to get hard, only to minutes to get soft. You share your box with 11 other guys, but worst of all, the only chick that ever sat on your face was your mom! So cheer up, your life isn't that bad! (end blog)

*opening laugh* ohhh Daniel....what a funny funny guy he can be....excerpt from his recent blog: "I'll just do the easy thing for now and hope it works out, besides that is what i really want. Well, i managed to fill this with basically nothing, and maybe to a new extent... (dull sarcastic "go me....)".......now those of you who do not know Daniel, he is about 5'9, weighs maybe 110 lbs on a good day, is white as a piece of paper with black hair, and has the attitude of an anti-religious, strictly hardcore rocker that is stuck living a life of insanity driven by anger issues.....lol totally not him. Oh well- moving on (sorry Daniel, I had to describe ya lol)--- I finally got out of PreCal THANK GOD because I had my mom call the principal daily and "discuss" the issue. Funny how she let 5 other precal kids from my class drop but she wouldnt let me.....*sarcastic and thoughtful expression* Tonight I'm goin "carousing" as the older generation might say, YEAH RIGHT i'm just goin out on the town til like 10:30 big freakin deal...and I'm going with Lizz so like the most trouble we could get in is being too rowdy in a store or goofin off too much. Note to all male readers: I am currently searching for potential prom dates (yes I know it's not til April! SHUT UP) just so that u know lol jk. Oh and if I even BEGIN to think that I might have a SLIGHT desire to go with Kyle-- I beg of you STOP ME!!!!!!!! That's a direct order! Uhhh I think I'm gonna leave early and umm........cause trouble lol..........ummm yeah LIZZ SHOULD UPDATE HER BLOG HINT HINT HINT ..................................c ya!

Home early from school- workin on homework for History...I felt the need to share today. Let's say there are two test subjects: Potential and Wannabe Potential. Potential spends his time charming the ladies, but yet cannot seem to find a matching mate. Wannabe Potential has no option of finding a matching mate, but does have a strong preference of a certain friend over other girls. Now, Potential can't actually be a potential boyfriend for anyone because he's a "use em and lose em" type--for its all he's ever known. Wannabe Potential would be a potential boyfriend for the ladies except he's kinda isolated and his career keeps him so. So now you know the 2 subjects. But what is the test you ask? Simple. Push them. Why test them if all we're going to do is push them? Well, we're testing in the hopes of an unexpected outcome of course! Ok so here's how we push them: Put Potential in a situation with someone (we'll call her Lady) which would match him greatly. Put Wannabe Potential with this friend (we'll call her Girl) that he adores so.........even though he must remain somewhat distant because of his career. By pushing Potential to remain with Lady, we get what results? Will he ignore the compatibility and do as he has with all the others? Or will he change for the better of the relationship and stick with her?????? Will Wannabe Potential be able to deal with the isolation his career requires of him? Will Girl understand and respect him enough to handle it? Or will their relationship end in a heated flame that ruins both the relationship and the previous friendship???????? NO ONE KNOWS!!! Which my friends, is exactly why the world is as it is. Life's never fair and you never know what to expect. I wish that Friday night I could have been elsewhere with someone, but it didn't happen. Instead I hung out with too many people in bug infested territory only to be dismayed and retreat to Sonic of all places. Hopefully tomorrow will be a better day...(smiley) God is good Daniel Lee, and what I told you last night was Truth. You did nothing to deserve any of it-- so don't blame the wrong person for my faults. I do love you and I always will, even in the way that you love me sometimes.....Life just threw us a curve ball that's all, it's a hit or miss type of thing babe........Your call.

I'm all alone today. Lizz is working, Marilea is at David's til 11pm, LaDona is with Bo for the rest of the day babysitting, Rachel is with Evan cuz he's off work, Kyle's out of town, and even Daniel is with someone else right now. I don't have to work and it's a Saturday, I have no money, and I've rented every movie there is to rent. I even stuped to asking my mother to go and do something with me but apparently floating in the pool readin her book is more important. I can't go ride my bike because it's broken somehow and I really have no homework because I'm dropping the class that I was assigned homework in. I saw about a thousand people at the first football game last night that I didn't want to see and I really didn't have that much fun. The whole reason I went to the game ended up being pointless which frustrated the hell out of me. On top of all that, Mark called me last night at about 10:45pm and we talked for maybe 10 minutes which is a first since we broke up. Speaking of which I did break up with Kyle on Wednesday night. And of course at midnight Brandon calls me, tells me he was in a 5-car pile-up .....wonderful news. He's ok and it wasn't his fault so it's all good there. I wouldn't exactly say that I am bored, and I know it's awfully selfish and self-centered to complain about being alone and everyone leaving me ......so I just don't know how to feel. Erica moved to Conway and she came to see me yesterday after school to tell me all of the crap that's goin on in her life......which is just so horrid. She's a great person and nothing this bad should be happening to her. I really am alone right now though, and all I wanna do is go right over that hill and have some fun out in the world but I can't........wow I suddenly feel pathetic like I have no life and this is as good as it'll get when just last night I was pretty happy with the world-amazing aint it. Saw all my old crew at the game- Josh and Cory, Jeremy, Buddy Rummel....and it hit me that even though they were always a blast and they cared about me, I'm ashamed almost that I was a part of that. So I've made amends with Mark for the time being, and Kyle refuses to talk to me because its awkward according to him. I think about what I need in my next boyfriend and then I realize how incredibly bitchy it is since I just got out of the relationship a few days ago. I have what I like to call "a new project" but it's by far not anything potential for the future...or at least I pray that it's not because if it turns out to be that way, God help me, I know that relationship will be Hell on Wheels. Sometimes I wonder if my life would be better if I didn't live here. I dunno but what I do know is that I need to go do SOMETHING...anything.....to get my mind off this crap.